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But also me, when our youngest daughter wakes up at 0600.But also me, when our youngest daughter wakes up at 0600.

Rewind to January

Back when I was losing my mind, I was working hard to identify my major triggers. Work, money, waking up feeling drugged and unproductive.

I was drugged and unproductive. I still take an antihistamine and a trazodone every night, and back then I was sleeping with a bottle of Nyquil (generic, of course) next to my bed so I could take little pulls throughout the night when I’d wake up multiple times, too anxious to sleep. I was hyper-aware I wasn’t going to get my “required” eight hours, and that would make me lose even more sleep.

When my work alarm went off at 0530, I’d lay there for another 15 minutes trying to shake the cobwebs before dragging myself into the kitchen to start the coffee. If, on my days off, I slept in until my kids woke up, I would rage all day long because I “had no time to myself” and “couldn’t get anything done”.

I would drag through my day, drinking coffee drinking coffee drinking coffee, and/or chewing coffee beans when I needed a boost. Some nights I ended up in tears because I just needed to get to sleep without fighting to brush teeth and hair, and reading 17 books, and tearing the house apart looking for stuffies that AREN’T MY RESPONSIBILITY.

 

 

On days I worked, I would come home so tired I could hardly stand up in the shower, ready for peace and quiet after having talked and catered to other humans for the past twelve+ hours. Only to find three other humans, so happy to see me, but who also needed me to talk and cater to them. I love my people, but sometimes I just need to be left alone.

 

Wait a tic

That’s it! I didn’t have any alone time. I wasn’t putting myself before all these other people. I was giving and giving and giving and losing and losing and losing myself.

 

 

Something had to change

Staying up later than my kids was never an option for me. I used to be a Grade A Night Owl, but as previously mentioned, there are some days I’m ready to cry by my kids’ bedtime. I fall straight into bed the moment they’re brushed and read and pajamaed.

In the past, I have tried to wake up early and “be productive” before my family gets up, but often I just floundered around without any specific goals, and felt I was just wasting my time, and precious sleep. So I went back to sleep, or didn’t get up early in the first place. Then my kids would wake me up and we’d start the vicious cycle again.

 

 

I had read Hal Elrod’s The Miracle Morning before, but sometimes I can read, or watch, or hear something, and at that point in my life it makes no difference.

Like the first time I read Robert Charlton’s How to Retire Early, I was like yeah, whatever. Then after reading it again three years later, we started maxing out all our retirement accounts so we, too, could retire early.

The first time we watched ‘The Secret Life of Walter Mitty’, we were both like yeah, whatever. Now we’ve seen it at least twenty times, and play the soundtrack anytime we need grounding, to remind ourselves the sea is deep and the world is wide.

I like to have at least three hours to myself every day, and I knew getting up earlier than my people was the only way to get make that happen. I went back to Hal Elrod’s website, podcast, and books, and tried again.

 

Hal’s Miracle Morning

He practices and suggests his SAVERS routine. Per miraclemorning.com:

Silence. Decreases stress & anxiety while increasing happiness & focus.

Affirmations. Improve self-esteem and self-confidence.

Visualization. Rehearse in your mind performing at your best.

Exercise. Increase energy and physical well-being.

Reading. Learn how to change any area of your life.

Scribing. Reflect, track progress, & cultivate gratitude.

 

Now don’t get overwhelmed 

You could knock everything out in as little as six minutes, if you wanted to. Make it twelve; one minute for each task, and an extra minute to move between each of them. I think it’s safe to say all of us have an extra twelve minutes in our day to commit to our wellbeing.

I typically spend one hour, and go in whatever order I feel like that day.

Silence for five minutes.

Visualization for five minutes.

Affirmations while I exercise, or clean house for fifteen minutes.

Read non-fiction for ten minutes.

Write in my journal, or my “mom” book (so my kids can really know who they’re discussing in therapy someday) for ten minutes.

 

I started off with my usual 0530 work alarm

I heard on a sleep podcast that humans actually don’t need eight hours, and people who get 6.5-7 hours of sleep live longer than those who sleep 8+ hours. I did not fact check that, but once I heard it, it was true in my head and that’s all that matters.

That said, I still aim for eight hours, and love to be in bed and reading fiction by 2030. 2100 at the latest. But if that doesn’t happen, I no longer lose sleep over the thought of losing sleep.

After four months, I set my daily alarm for 0500. That way, I get could in my full routine even on work days. My entire productive routine out of the way, before I went to work. I cannot tell you what that has done for my mental health.

You know how it feels to get something out of the way, to cross something off your list.  You know how it feels to exercise in the morning, instead of waiting until you get off work.  You know how it feels to have an impending responsibility hanging over your head all day.

Now my body wakes me up naturally anywhere from 0345 to 0500. On 0345 mornings I grant myself that old 15 minutes to shake off the cobwebs, then I get up and get going. I say out loud (or to myself, if there’s a child in my bed), “Mornings are a gift I give myself.”

I keep my phone in the bathroom, so I have to actually get out of bed and walk across the room to turn it off. By that point, I’m committed. I have an actual clock next to my bed, so I don’t have to get out of bed to see what time it is if I wake up in the middle of the night. The Nyquil stays in the medicine cabinet now.

 

My ideal morning

I wake up with, or before my alarm.

I walk into my bathroom to turn the alarm on my phone off.

I do not check my texts, or emails, or look at what the stock market is doing.

I wash my face with a cold, wet washcloth.

I put on my work out clothes.

I drink at least 32 oz of water.

I go to my backyard and sit or stand facing east with my bare feet on the ground.

I focus on my breaths, and the sounds of the birds. Gambel’s quail, Mourning and White-winged doves, Curve-billed thrashers, Northern cardinals, House finches, House sparrows, Verdins, Harris hawks, Bronzed cowbirds, Cactus wrens, Gila woodpeckers, Lucy’s warblers.

I close my eyes and envision what life would be like if I no longer had to go to work. Lately I’m like “Wait a minute, you’re funemployed, that is your life”, and that feels really good.

I visualize the monthly rent from each of our five rentals houses, and mentally move the exact amounts into our business checking account. There are no mortgage payments going out, only income coming in.

I visualize our personal checking account paying only our day to day expenses, with no primary mortgage going out. I recently wrote myself a check from the Universe for $819,876.23. That’s the exact amount we need to pay off all our houses. If anyone has an extra million bucks they don’t know what to do with, send it our way! That would retire us for life, and we’d be very grateful.

I manifest AF.

I imagine the love and joy I’ll feel when my people wake up, and the laughs we’ll share that day.

I go inside and put my ear buds in and choose the first Abraham Hicks video YouTube recommends.

Then I go for a run (every other day), or workout with a Maggie Binkley video on Prime, or lift weights or practice yoga in my living room, while Abraham reminds me over and over and over that I am the creator of my own reality. That I get to choose how I’ll feel about any situation life throws at me. That the most important thing is for me to be happy.

 

I go into the kitchen, grind the coffee beans, and start the drip. While the coffee is brewing, I eat a bowl of scrambled eggs made in advance, 1/2 cup of cottage cheese, or two cheese sticks, to get the protein pumping.

 

 

Don’t worry, I eat again later, after my people wake up.

While I eat, I do at least one language lesson on Duolingo; either Spanish, Norwegian, or Portuguese.

I take my vitamins.

When my coffee is finished, I sit with a cup and read for ten minutes, then write for ten minutes about my thoughts on what I just read, or what I experienced yesterday, or what I’d like my daughters to know about me.

 

That’s it!

After my routine is complete, I can take on the rest of the day a productive, accomplished human who can engage with other humans without blowing her top. Most days. Some days. Occasionally. I eat second breakfast. I brush my teeth.

I no longer feel like the toxic slug I was, dragging myself between unnecessary tasks or actual responsibilities. When I get up and get my day out of the way, everything else is a bonus. Any other exercise I do is just tacking onto my health. Any other item I cross off my to do list is just fueling my productivity. I have more energy, more patience, more time, and I can give my family the attention they deserve.

 

Also me, when our youngest daughter wakes up at 0600.

I can’t control what anyone else is doing, only what I am doing. I am the creator of my own reality. I love my alone time. I love the quiet. I love that cup of coffee while I read and write. I love that I can take my routine anywhere. I love securing my own oxygen mask before helping others.  I love I love I love.

 

Resources:

• The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) by Hal Elrod
• Miracle Morning Millionaires: What the Wealthy Do Before 8AM That Will Make You Rich by Hal Elrod and David Osborn
• Money, and the Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Wealth, Health, and Happiness by Esther and Jerry Hicks
• Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

• Tell Me Your Life Story, Mom: A Mother’s Guided Journal and Memory Keepsake Book

• ‘Headspace’ app 
• ‘Duolingo’ app

• miraclemorning.com
• ‘Achieve Your Goals’ podcast
• ‘The Living Joyfully’ podcast
• ‘The Exploring Unschooling’ podcast
• ‘The Ultimate Human’ podcast
• ‘Mindful Parenting’ podcast
• ‘Morbid’ podcast (two women who cuss a lot discussing real tragedies and the paranormal)(look, I can’t self-help every minute of the day)

• ‘AH Universe’ YouTube channel
• ‘Life is Joy’ YouTube channel
• ‘Abraham Hicks Library’ YouTube channel
• ‘Taylor Swift’ YouTube channel
• ‘Saturday Night Live’ YouTube channel
• ‘Maggie Binkley’ Prime Video

• Daily Stress Formula. We take two capsules daily. The first day he took it, Greg told me “This has been the best day I’ve had in years.” (My dudes, I am not your provider, I’m just telling you what has worked for us.)
• Microdose. IYKYK.

 

 

Mornings are a gift I give myself. How do you start your day?